Have you visited the Fap House lately? I ain’t talking about visiting your mother-in-law’s place, where your wife insists you’re not allowed to fuck in the guestroom, leading you to rub out load after load after explosive load in the bathroom. (“I swear, honey, I just have the shits from your mom’s meatloaf!”) I’m actually talking about a new premium site that popped up at the beginning of April. They made a ridiculously grand entrance into the online porn market, building up a following at a rate that would make just about any smut peddler jealous; a couple of months in, they’re already getting over 30 million visits a month.

Craving milf porn? Experience is a hell of a thing in any field, including porno. We’re wired to lose control of basic common sense and decency at the site of teen flesh, but let’s be honest: 18-year-olds simply can’t fuck as well as women with decades of practice. That’s just one of the reasons I like to round out my smut viewing with MILF sites like MYLF.

Who doesn’t love teens (18+) at Team Skeet? They’re fresh, ripe, and just figuring out all the amazing things they can do with those perfect bodies. I’m particularly fond of the kinky 18+ girls, the ones with burgeoning cases of nymphomania. You know, the kind of girls who make the best porn sluts. There are a lot of places you can watch these nubile young things get nasty, and TeamSkeet.com is one of the better ones.

Look, we all know that porn is one of the greatest inventions known to mankind. But while it’s great to sit back, relax, lube up, and sink into the warm and welcoming arms of conventional porn, do you ever get that nagging urge for something more interactive? You know, the kind of porn that speaks to you?

Adult Time! Too lonely to Netflix And Chill? No worries, pal. I got something that will cheer you right up. Adult Time aka the Premium Adult Digital Entertainment Network won’t get you laid quite the same way as getting a woman horny while showing her chick flicks, but they do have a metric fuck-ton of dirty movies to shake your dick at. You’re going to get off either way, right? You won’t even have to order the broad a pizza.

You’ve heard of RealityKings (rk.com). As much as I like to pretend my dirty little corner is the center of the online smut universe, there’s almost no way you’ve found me without first passing by that landmark of Internet porn. It all started in a college dorm room nearly twenty years ago and has grown into a fucking empire of sex movies. I’m talking tens of thousands of full-length, HD videos, spread across a huge network of adult websites.

IKnowThatGirl! How many times have you been watching porn and wished you would stumble upon a girl you know? Maybe you’re even lucky enough to have actually done so at some point. I know it happens. Every once in a while, you see a comment under a video where someone says “hey, I went to high school with this slut! Glad to see she’s doing big things.” That’s the dream, right? To be able to find a hot chick in porn that you actually know? Well, maybe not the dream. The real dream is actually banging her yourself. But finding her in porn is a nice consolation prize, is it not?

SpiceVids slid into my DMs this morning and it seemed like perfect timing, because we’re in the middle of pumpkin spice season. All the women you know are paying extra to have cinnamon, nutmeg, ginger and clove extracts added to their coffee, donuts, cigarettes and tampons, so why wouldn’t porn fanatics want the same? The answer, of course, is the burning. Fortunately for all of us perverts, the titular spice we’ll be looking at today ain’t the seasonal kind traditionally added to otherwise flavorless pumpkin guts. This spice may be hot as fucking hell, but I ain’t referring to cayenne or paprika, either.

The tagline under the logo outside Bang Bros Network aka Bang Brothers says it’s Where The Girls Really Know How To Fuck! They call themselves The Original Amateur Porn Network and then show you pictures of your favorite professional video-sluts. I’m talking about girls like Adriana Chechik, Gianna Dior, and Jade Kush. Pornstars you know and love doing amateur work? It all looks pretty polished to me.

Brazzers network might just be the most widely recognized name in pornography today. Even if you’re just a casual porn watcher (we know you’re not, ya fuckin perv), you’ve likely heard of Brazzers. They are notorious for providing some of the highest quality content, sexiest porn stars, and well-executed extended scenes. It also probably doesn’t hurt that they seem to have ad space on nearly every free porn site on the web.