XConfessions

I once jerked off in a Starbuck’s restroom after taking some upskirt shots of the soccer mom drinking her latte. Another time, I stole my stepsister’s panties and used them as a mask while I cranked off into her pillow. What’s your dirty confession? That’s the question behind XConfessions, an arty porn site that makes smut based on anonymous confessions.

The site was started in 2013 by Spanish porn visionary Erika Lust. She initially just wanted to create an online place for people to share their sexual confessions, but it soon blossomed into an online community of perverts who love sex and film. Today, the site gets over 4,000 visitors each and every day.

I don’t immediately see any exposed genitals, but I’m hoping it’s just a little softcore out front for show. I see anal scenes represented with classy side shots that don’t show penetration, though there is a dude with his tongue in a lady’s shapely ass crack a couple of rows down. Another dude licks a twat, obscuring the actual cooter with his face.

Every movie has a title card with a stylized logo, and most of them are pretty SFW and would be suitable for Netflix. I can guess what kind of sex confession I’m going to hear in Tips and Tricks for Lickin’ Clits, and it’s pretty obvious what kind of touch they’re talking about in Hungry for Your Touch. I’m less sure about The Fog, with its horror movie logo, leather-clad stud and starlet, and the weirdly lit fog in the background.

The group sex photos on the cover of Fuck, Kill, Marry intrigued me, so I clicked for a closer look. The premise revolves around the game of the same name, and while I think some actual fucking goes on, nobody gets married nor killed.

There’s a one-minute trailer available. It opens with some goth broad walking down a hallway in a top hat, and then we see her at a table with a bunch of similarly garbed chicks. She does a voiceover about celebrating the Day of the Dead, throwing in some stuff about love and fragility. The montage shows fishnetted broads riding faces in a big orgy that reminds me of Eyes Wide Shut without the masks. The ominous music helps set the tone.

Besides the ripped Black dude, none of the flick’s talent had the typical pornstar look. Most look like pretty average chicks, which I think is part of the appeal. This erotica feels more realistic than a Los Angelos studio bang enhanced by plastic and Botox.

I appreciate the video previews, since a lot of premium sites are doing away with them. XConfessions goes one further, and will even give you a full free movie. The catch is that you have to give them your email address. If your wife finds their spam, just say you developed a mild interest in Spanish arthouse cinema. I give it 50/50 odds she believes you.

If you check out the previews and decide you’d like to stay for the feature, click your way over to the sign-up page. A subscription will run you about $35, which is a few bucks more than your typical paysite in 2024. I guess that fancy editing costs more money than the guys who just aim a camera at a girl’s butthole as it gets reamed. Six-month and yearly plans break down to better monthly rates.

Perks of membership are listed below. They’ve got over 150 films on the menu so far, and “new films released regularly”. Members can read and comment on all confessions, big fucking deal, and also write your own confessions. Hey, if they turned my own confessions into pornos, I wouldn’t complain!

I had to dig into the movie details a bit, but it looks like XConfessions typically puts out a couple of flicks a month. Movies usually run between 15 and 30 minutes long. This ain’t a porn site for the value masturbator. This is some highbrow shit for perverts who appreciate some art in their fap routine.

The layout for the site has a weird quirk where sometimes I had to click a button a few times before anything happened. The video loaded right away, though, streaming at 720p without any apparent buffering. I bumped it up to 1080p without issue.

The movie starts with a voiceover on a black screen. This broad loves laying in bed with her boyfriend on a stormy night, watching horror movies. The grainy footage appears of a stack of VHS tapes, including The Fog.

“I sometimes imagine what the movies would be like if they turned into a porno,” she says, explaining why the video doesn’t have the same cover as the 1980 release. The movie stays artfully grainy and lo-fi, and we suddenly pan around a weirdly lit, smoky graveyard scene. It reminds me of the beginning of Thriller, including the couple on a date in a creepy-ass location.

The Asian chick and the White dude argue in heavy accents. He lights a cigarette in her mouth, and then lights his own with her cherry. Cue ominous synth noise for no apparent reason.

The Asian chick opens a map, but they can’t figure out how to read it properly, maybe on account of the fucked-up lighting. “Shit, this place is like an Evil Dead film,” the dude says.

“This place really gives me the creeps,” she replies, and then there are some haunted house noises in the background. He kisses her neck, and then we look at some fog rolling over some flowers.

Typical porno cinematography focuses on the dirtiest stuff, like clear, crisp, close-up lingering shots of glistening wet pussies getting eaten out. Here, we have a lot of quick shots showing fuzzy cunnilingus, faces, smokey scenery, and far-away views of the couple being kinky in a car. I’m sure you can still whack off to it, but it’s going to be a different experience than you’re getting on a site like Brazzers.

They’re outside of the car making out at the halfway mark, and I wondered to myself, “Is this even porn?” I’m really not sure it is. Even when the boner popped out a few seconds later and the lady started stroking it, I still wasn’t sure. I think, if anything, the movies at XConfessions fall squarely into the erotica category. These are the artiest fucking sex movies I’ve seen all year.

Ultimately, XConfessions isn’t going to appeal to most porn fans. If it did, more smut would look like this. Instead of focusing only on the primal, animalistic elements of fucking that get you all hard and drippy, these guys layer everything with a shit-ton of ambience. Some folks are going to love it, but the rest of you are going to think it’s pretentious art-school bullshit that doesn’t show you nearly enough for what they’re charging.

They do offer free previews, though, and a full free movie to interested parties. It’s worth a look if you’ve never seen something like this before; XConfessions.com doesn’t do porno, they do highbrow erotica based on anonymous sex fantasies.

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