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Porn 2 All! Have you ever come across some hipster normie who constantly reminds you of how non-mainstream they are? You know, the kind of person who is proud of payin...
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Porn 2 All! Have you ever come across some hipster normie who constantly reminds you of how non-mainstream they are? You know, the kind of person who is proud of paying five times the price for a coffee because they were ethically sourced for a bran farmer who is 4% less oppressed than most other places?
I’m talking about the kind of people who will happily pay a premium price to eat at a burger restaurant where the food is served on a shovel rather than a plate and where the beer is home-brewed with the yeast taken from feminist panties. Now, that’ll be $300, please.
In day-to-day life, these people can really grind my gears. However, in the world of porn, those who choose to sidestep mainstream smut sites and opt for lesser-discovered sites actually hold a special place in my heart. Their open-mindedness often leads us to find some of the most underrated porn tube sites around.
Well, only some of the time. It’s also fair to say that some of them might recommend some bullshit sites from time to time, and this is why I’ve stepped in to act as a buffer and subject all of the sites to a balls-deep review and ensure they’re worth visiting before you invest the time, effort, or membership fee required to check them out.
And this brings us face to face with the topic of today’s review. I’m dipping my hand into a bucket of lube to get ready to review a porn tube platform called Tonicporn.com. According to the site itself, this platform has millions of free porn videos to watch, and I’m keen to find out whether it’s able to put its money where its horny mouth is.
Yep, it’s time to turn my embattled porn hammer (my cock) into a redraw mess again as I subject it to another mission deep behind porn lines. Will Tonicporn.com be able to impress us as an underrated porn tube site? Or will it do the opposite? There’s only one road to finding out, and The Porn Dude knows the way!
While some non-mainstream sites opt to focus on a particular porn niche rather than try to tackle multiple XXX categories at once, Tonicporn.com has gone for the latter, and its range of categories stretches from bust amateur blondes and outdoor orgies. Now, let’s take its porn collection for a test run!
● This Russian Immigrant is Ready for Anything to Stay in America - This clip stars the wild Sasha Beart, who, despite being relatively underrated, did appear on eFukt in a video entitled ‘’Daddy’s Little Psychopath.’’ To give you an idea of how sexually wild this slut is, the tattoo that reads ‘’When I fuck, I don’t give a fuck’’ on her thighs should tell you all you need to know. However, if you can’t be bothered to read it or make out what the fuck she is talking about, then this clip should do it! Sasha plays the role of a slutty Russian emigrant seeking a green card. To get one, she needs to impress the BBC of the border guard. Fuck me, this girl is utterly filthy! After a demented blowjob that makes this hung black dude sexually squeal, he sinks his dick in her pussy and fucks her brains out. He got so carried away that he missed the tattooed arrow pointing at her asshole with the words ‘’insert here’’ until the very end. Finally, he pushes his way into that hungry butt and fucks her until she starts babbling something in Russian and comes uncontrollably. Green card? Secured! Welcome to America, you whore!
● Jessie Rogers Goes Airtight in a BBC Gangbang - Man, who needs air, anyway? Jessie Rogers clearly fuckin’ doesn’t! In this wild four-on-one gangbang for Blacked.com, we see Rogers put all of her holes to work in ensuring no dick is left out. In a display of some legit nympho behavior, we see this wild whore thrust into the center of an interracial gangbang and lose her mind. With a cock in her ass, one in her dripping pussy, and another as far down her throat as she can fit it, Jessie goes fully airtight and has her brains fucked out. Luckily, the fourth cock gives her something to hang on to throughout, although she often stuffs that one down her neck too!
● Elena Versus Lancelot’s Sword - The moment I saw the thumbnail of this clip, I had to paraphrase that German dude from Gladiator and say, ‘’To the assholes who are about to be destroyed, we salute you!’’ Seriously, how this chick managed to make that dick fit in her ass defies reality, but she did. Not only that, but the scene goes on for 43 fuckin’ minutes! Lancelot doesn’t seem to give a shit that this asshole will never be the same after his dick has been inside of it, and he proceeds to wreck it by pinning this cock-crazy slut down and giving her the kind of intense anal fucking that would make most women run for the hills. Not Elena, though, this bitch loves it!
The site starts with a header section home to a top bar menu, the logo, the main menu, and the search bar. The top bar logo contains links to other adult sites that Tonicporn.com is friendly with, and the logo is pretty generic, which spells out the site’s name in blue and black lettering.
The main menu of Tonicporn.com takes you to some of the site’s most popular areas, such as top-rated videos, most viewed content, a portfolio of featured models, categories, and an on-site blog. The latter, though, only contained one article, and it wasn’t a very fun read.
The homepage of Tonicporn.com starts by offering you a selection of XXX videos that other users are currently watching. These come in the standard porn tube format with a thumbnail, title, upload date, user rating, and view count. An identical format section also shows the latest videos to be added to the site.
As you approach the footer of Tonicporn.com, you’re greeted with a selection of content tags that people most commonly search for on the site. There’s also a bunch of SEO-optimized text telling you what the site is all about and what it can offer.
And last but not least, let’s talk about the smut featured on the site. I was pretty impressed by the porn I found on Tonicporn.com and found it to be a hearty mixture of content that featured a gorgeous blend of both underrated and downright iconic pornstars. Overall, there was really something for everyone. However, if you’re expecting ‘’millions’’ of videos, you might be disappointed, which brings me to my next point.
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