SexTB

Man, I’m so fucking excited about this one. This genre is a tried and true favorite amongst me and just about every dude out there. Lesbian porn. Its popularity needs to explanation. Watching two slutty 18+ babes eat each other out, scissor, get fingered, and do all kinds of sexy shit is amazing. It’s fucking magical is what it is. Who needs dicks in their porn? I’d much rather watch some chick with a huge rack fuck another slut, hopefully with even bigger tits if I get to choose, with a big ass dildo. Fucking “regular porn” always has ugly ass dudes or throws in those weird shots where all you see is the guy's sweaty ass and weird-looking balls. Fuck that. The female body is a damn work of art.

I really thought Noodle Dude was going to be a sprawling directory of all the best pasta websites on the internet, each with a longform review full of useful info slathered with hilarious jokes, all delivered by a noodle-snorting mascot with a huge head. I was all ready to read writeups of the local ramen shops and Italian joints, thinking maybe this Noodle Dude would turn me on to some good shit I can show off to the Tinder ladies. I’m not sure if you know this, but a good bowl of high-end linguine or even a fancy bowl of truffle-infused mac and cheese can sometimes be the difference between getting laid by an internet stranger or going home alone to jack off again.

AdultMagazinesPDF kind of gives away their whole gimmick with the title, but there’s nothing wrong with that. I appreciate the clever shit as much as the next guy, but sometimes it’s nice to know right upfront what you’re getting and not be misled. I can’t tell you how disappointed I was when I found out Amazon sells everything but big-ass tall bitches with huge racks.

JAVTsunami! Nobody does porn quite like the Japanese. That nation pumps that shit out as though it were its main fucking export. Seriously, there are more amateur, professional, and homemade videos coming out of there than anywhere else that I can think of aside from maybe India. But, still, the production quality of JAV porn is next fucking level. The hard part is finding a good source for the shit that isn’t going to cost you an arm and a leg. I know you cucks don’t have the money to pay for every single video of an Asian slut getting fucked that you watch. You’d be in the negative within 24 hours.

XPlay! Oh, you motherfuckers want to play games? This is where you need to be! Imagine a world full of Hentai games; you're in the porn this time, my guy! Haven't you always dreamed of smashing baddies every day like me? This is as close as it fucking gets unless you're a fucking pornstar, and if you're porn-obsessed like I am, you probably find yourself scrolling past those ads with 3D whores with big ass tits flopping their asses on a dick on an ad beside the video you're fapping to all the fucking time. If you think you've seen it all, you're in for a world of surprises. Imagine not just watching those sexy-as-hell Hentai scenes but actually controlling the action. Maybe you've been thriving off of Hentai pornos like a damn king, but trust me, you're about to enter an entirely different perversion universe.

Ah, JAV torrents from Jav Junkies! It doesn’t matter what kind of smut you get off to because, we can all agree that the craziest, kinkiest, and the most fucked up shit comes from Japan. Don’t listen to anyone who tells you otherwise. While there is still plenty of ‘normal’ porn from Japan, the majority of the adult stuff coming from the Land Of The Rising Sun seems to be of the weird, bizarre variety, some of which can jade even the most hardcore fap master. The sight of a Japanese slut with her face covered in sticky jizz from multiple cocks is just but an example of how kinky the Japs can get.